Accepting Criticism
What makes one a writer? Is it simply putting words on a page? Yes, in some ways, it is simply the act of writing. I have been a writer for as long as I could remember. However, for the past few years, I have been a Writer. Yup. That's right. With a capital "W." So, if the act of writing makes one a writer, what makes one a Writer? What changed for me? I began to let go of my babies. I began to submit them, to let others read them. It's one of the scariest things I have ever done. I don't deal well with criticism, as I've mentioned in previous posts. I tend to take it all personally, and that is true with my writing, too. I started taking my writing semi-seriously about 6 or 7 years ago. I had just gotten "online" and signed up for an email newsletter, Writing for Dollars!, which listed paying markets. One market caught my eye, Secrets & Strategies, a newsletter for office support personnel. I emailed a query for an article idea, and the editor rejected it, but suggested an alternative article. I wrote it, submitted it as a two-part article and she bought it. I was on a high - I had crossed the line and was published! I emailed Dan Case, the editor of Writing for Dollars! and thanked him for getting me started. He suggested I write an article on my experience, which I did, and which he bought. Woo-hoo! I had 2 published articles in a very short period of time! I am an animal lover and decided to give that area a shot. I queried a magazine about doing a holistic animal care article. The editor said he was interested, and I got to work. The next time I contacted him with a question about the article submission, he told me he wasn't really interested. I took it personally, and put my writing away. Didn't even follow up with him to find out if it was the article content, or the writing. I did not submit anything again for nearly five years, when another writer told me about a magazine editor looking for stories. I queried, and she called me, saying she loved the article idea and would take it to the editor-in-chief. I submitted the article, with pictures, and got back a short email saying the article idea had been tabled. Again, I put the article away and haven't done anything with it. It's not a great article, but I really should dust it off, update it, and try to sell it. Maybe I will one of these days.
I had lunch with a friend in December of 2005, and we talked about our goals and the paths we could take to make our dreams come true. We promised each other that we would take positive steps in 2006 to further our dreams. So, in 2006, I published Denim & Diamonds, the novel I wrote during National Novel Writing Month 2004. That has done wonders for my self-esteem. I proved to myself that I could put my writing out there, actually let others read it, and the world would continue to spin on its axis, the sun would continue to rise in the east and set in the west, and people would continue to admit to knowing me. I took the plunge and wrote an article on estate planning for a regional paralegal publication - and it was published. Then the statewide association contacted me and requested permission to print it. I plunged again - I queried Heritage Writer about doing an article on scrapbooking in blended families. And it was published. 2006 was an AWESOME year for me. I did things that I never thought I could do.
But does it all go perfect? No. I submitted a story to a juried contest. Got it back last week. Bear in mind, this is a story I've gotten good feedback on. The critique was horrible. I mean, kick me in the teeth, then throw them over a cliff bad. My first reaction was to think, oh, God, here we go. I have no business writing. I have no talent. I'm wasting my time. Then, I took a step back and re-evaluated. I have no information on the judge. What I submitted may have been a genre that judge doesn't like. One of the judge's criticisms was that it wasn't spicy enough - yet my story was written for a "sweet" line with no sex allowed. Mine may have been the 999th entry that judge read. That judge may not have gotten any the night before, or may have been fighting the flu. Anything. Worst case scenario, that judge did not like that story that day. It doesn't mean I am not a Writer. I will get right back on the horse and keep submitting, because I am a Writer.
Take a moment to think about how you deal with criticism. Has your fear of criticism kept you from submitting? Has you allowed criticism to stop you from submitting? If you are serious about being a Writer (or whatever your dream is), you must learn to deal with criticism. Take it in stride, and recognize it for what it is. Learn from it, but do not let it stop you in your quest for success.
I had lunch with a friend in December of 2005, and we talked about our goals and the paths we could take to make our dreams come true. We promised each other that we would take positive steps in 2006 to further our dreams. So, in 2006, I published Denim & Diamonds, the novel I wrote during National Novel Writing Month 2004. That has done wonders for my self-esteem. I proved to myself that I could put my writing out there, actually let others read it, and the world would continue to spin on its axis, the sun would continue to rise in the east and set in the west, and people would continue to admit to knowing me. I took the plunge and wrote an article on estate planning for a regional paralegal publication - and it was published. Then the statewide association contacted me and requested permission to print it. I plunged again - I queried Heritage Writer about doing an article on scrapbooking in blended families. And it was published. 2006 was an AWESOME year for me. I did things that I never thought I could do.
But does it all go perfect? No. I submitted a story to a juried contest. Got it back last week. Bear in mind, this is a story I've gotten good feedback on. The critique was horrible. I mean, kick me in the teeth, then throw them over a cliff bad. My first reaction was to think, oh, God, here we go. I have no business writing. I have no talent. I'm wasting my time. Then, I took a step back and re-evaluated. I have no information on the judge. What I submitted may have been a genre that judge doesn't like. One of the judge's criticisms was that it wasn't spicy enough - yet my story was written for a "sweet" line with no sex allowed. Mine may have been the 999th entry that judge read. That judge may not have gotten any the night before, or may have been fighting the flu. Anything. Worst case scenario, that judge did not like that story that day. It doesn't mean I am not a Writer. I will get right back on the horse and keep submitting, because I am a Writer.
Take a moment to think about how you deal with criticism. Has your fear of criticism kept you from submitting? Has you allowed criticism to stop you from submitting? If you are serious about being a Writer (or whatever your dream is), you must learn to deal with criticism. Take it in stride, and recognize it for what it is. Learn from it, but do not let it stop you in your quest for success.
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